By Kinks_and_curves
1310 views
20th Mar 2024
I have used that term a lot but selling really is a two-way street and I feel sometimes that can be overlooked. I feel assumptions are made, you’re just here for money, you don’t actually enjoy it and so on.
I don’t make assumptions, I treat each buyer like the individual they are and as sellers we deserve the same, we are all here for different reasons, it doesn’t matter what the reason is we just need to treat each other with respect.
As I said above, we are all here for different reasons and one of those is fun!
It should be fun for us as well; fun is part of the experience. As a seller I want you to enjoy yourself to the fullest but please be mindful I also want to be enjoying myself.
I love what I do, I love getting creative and letting go, I want to enjoy the experience I have with buyers, and I want them to be happy.
All fun had here should be mutual.
Yes, I’m getting paid but that’s not an instant turn on, the experience as a whole should be enjoyed by both parties.
Firstly, you’ll enjoy yourself as a buyer a lot more because I’m giving you my all, my best, I’m turned on ready to play. I’m more than a mere kink dispenser and the moment I feel that’s what I’m treated like it takes away my experience, my fun.
Secondly just because I’m a seller doesn’t invalidate my right to actually enjoy the experience simply because money is involved.
I want to give you my all and I don’t want to insult you by pretending to enjoy myself.
I know, I know, here I go again with this, but it is vital!
Remember we are all human!
Talking about and agreeing to a sale is a whole experience for me, not just a transaction, for it to be fun all round it has to (as I said above) be mutual.
You can’t just throw money at me and expect me to just be ready and turned on, money isn’t a substitute for manners or respect.
Buyers deserve respect and manners just as much, after all they are spending their money and whoever they decide to spend it on should be mindful of that.
Sometimes how I look at things is how would I feel as a buyer!
I find it helps me see things from a different perspective but also, I use it to try better myself as a seller.
The reason I’m including this in this blog is because I don’t think it’s a bad thing to try and look at it from the perspective of others sometimes.
Ask yourself as a buyer if you were selling would you be happy with the way you spoke or were spoken to? Would you find that respectful or polite?
We all have feelings and it’s so important to be kind, the world of kink, buying and selling can be tough enough so we should be respectful to each other.
Using the role reversal I touched upon above I’ll give an example.
If we were to speak to buyers the same way we are spoken to sometimes we wouldn’t be sellers for long.
Just remember we are people behind the screens and bios.
I must stress the importance of this being a 2-way street and just communicating, being polite and honest gets us all a lot further.
We all have limits including names.
I have seen this being discussed before, loser for example, not all buyers want to be called that especially when you haven’t established boundaries first. This does work both ways.
I have had messages using names such as slag or slut thrown at me in the first message without even a hello. Now I’m not going to go into the ins and outs of those words and liking not liking but I’m using them as a comparison.
Boundaries should always be established first.
It’s not just names it’s boundaries full stop, I spend time getting to understand what is a no so I don’t potentially ruin your experience, however I’ve had instances where I’ve said no and it’s met with why? Or I’ll pay more, or you might like it if you try it.
When someone expresses themselves and puts boundaries in place, they should always be respected both ways.
If you’re ever unsure just ask, take your time and get to know the person you’re playing with.
I feel it’s important to mention there are so many amazing buyers here who deserve the same as sellers, they deserve manners, politeness, respect, to be treated like more than a walking wallet.
This blog isn’t to have a dig it’s to merely try and create an understanding, to ask that you try and look it at from a seller’s perspective sometimes.
Thank you to all the wonderful buyers of the site for supporting us!
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