By Kinks_and_curves 445 views 9th Sep 2024
I know I’ve said this so many times but it’s true! Seeing a video online or on social media or a click bait article is not a true representation of what selling is. It’s something designed to grab attention
Ask yourself honestly if it were that easy or lucrative then why aren’t more people doing it or making a full time job (I know for some it is but I’m talking higher numbers)?
You don’t just join, demand and get! People aren’t just going to throw money at you or fund your lifestyle!
You need to work hard, put in time, invest your own money and be prepared to give 100% effort!
You will go nowhere fast just waiting for stuff to happen or hoping buyers will fall into your lap, I’ve spent 4 years building what I have here! I’ve been on other platforms and doing this a long time and I still need to work hard because the moment I stop is the moment I may as well not bother
I don’t find it helpful to get comfortable and just assume that’s it, I push myself, I ask myself how I can ramp things up a notch. Selling is a commitment, an investment of your whole self
As much as I’d like to say it is I can’t, I’d be lying! Don’t get me wrong there are so many positives but as I mentioned at the beginning the stuff you see online, the I make thousands a month selling headlines are not a realistic representation
I find those frustrating, if you’re going to write these things and make these videos then at least be honest, be truthful, talk about the ups and equally important the downs so people can make a fair assessment on whether it’s for them or not
This is why people can struggle to see it through, they soon realise there are downs, they give up because it’s not as easy as advertised!
Just because you’re selling doesn’t mean everyone is buying!
You’re not entitled to sales or tips, hard selling and demands are a turn off for buyers
If a buyer interacts with you that’s not an automatic assumption of a sale, some buyers like spreading the love or enjoy having a chat or some banter in the comments. If a buyer posts looking for something and you’re offering it doesn’t mean they have to pick you
Don’t brand someone a time waster if they say no or change their mind, don’t pry we aren’t entitled to an explanation, imagine how uncomfortable that can be for buyers
You sadly have to learn to brush things off and develop a not caring about what randoms online think about me mentality because honestly it can be quite the downer
From personal experience it’s something that just happens overtime, now I’d be lying if I said it doesn’t still get to me at times because it does, I am still human
What helps me is trying to flip my perspective, people that troll or are rude don’t deserve to live rent free in my head, I just pity them because in all honesty they must be very unfulfilled to behave in such a way
It’s important to remember that you can block and report, if necessary, also not everyone is like that, the good will outweigh the bad
I think mistakes have made me a better seller, without mistakes how do we learn?
It’s no good beating yourself up, see mistakes as a tool to improve and learn from so you can spot warning signs next time
When I first started I was gullible, I was told I’d get a good sum of money for cam but after the session , I was hesitant but unfortunately fell for it, I learned never play before pay and this was also a time before this site existed before I had more knowledge
I don’t think back to it and kick myself, I look back at it and realise the mistake I made and use it as an example to teach others
Buyers are humans with feelings and wants, they know what they like and are entitled to respect, even those who love being degraded or enjoy being submissive or a financial submissive, absolutely everyone deserves to be seen as a person
When you look at people with pound signs it develops a conveyor belt mentality, pay, play, next one in line!
Buyers want to feel cared about and so they should! They are more than a means to an end!
I didn’t just know everything I know now, I take my time and educate myself, I ask questions, I learn a lot from buyers in all honesty and I’m grateful for that
Selling should be done safely, aftercare, safe words, if you’re dishing out physical tasks and punishments do you know the potential repercussions?
As I’ve said already you never stop learning, you have to be willing to put time and effort into educating yourself
By educating ourselves and asking questions we better ourselves as sellers, it also allows us to continually make the experience better all round
Never be afraid to put boundaries in place, don’t be swayed by money
This is a lesson I have learned myself , when I started out I was learning about me and my kinks and limits , I’d do stuff I wasn’t sure about and it left a bad taste in my mouth so now unless I’m 100% happy and on board I won’t do it
I won’t do it so I can say I’ve made a sale!
You might like it if you tried it
What if I pay more?
Why?
No means no don’t be afraid to say no! If I’m not comfortable or I’ve politely declined I don’t need persuading nor do I want persuading, I’d rather lose a sale and feel comfortable than say yes and feel bad about it!
I think it’s important to touch upon this, just because this is done online doesn’t mean it’s any less dangerous!
Think of the long term, let’s take showing face for example, would it bother you if someone recognised you? What could the consequences be if that happened? I am not saying this to put anyone off but realistically danger can be out there in various forms
Some tips that may be useful
Use a separate email for payment methods, set up one for those and here, never use personal emails. Same goes for things such as Skype accounts for sessions, make a separate one dedicated to sessions
When uploading photos don’t cross post, so don’t post stuff on here that you post on personal social media
Be careful using apps that give away locations / table numbers like restaurant ones where people can send drinks and food
When posting pics be mindful of the background and what is in it, so if you’re taking photos in your house is there photos of family and such to be aware of?
Selling is tough and there are so many unrealistic things online that portray it as a get rich quick scheme or something that it isn’t!
The realism is that it’s hard, it can feel lonely, some days make me question why I continue
It’s not all big pay outs and funded shopping sprees or gifts, it’s dedication and care, it’s education and exploration, it’s constant learning, it’s draining at times
It’s also hugely rewarding and fun and exciting, you’ll meet incredible people
In all honesty it’s finding a balance, it’s finding what works for you, it’s giving yourself a break when needed
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