By Kinks_and_curves 818 views 3rd Jun 2024
It might seem contradictory, but maintaining a balance between enjoyment and responsibility is important. Whether you're a buyer or a seller, understanding and respecting boundaries ensures that the interactions remain positive, protects your financial and emotional wellbeing, and enhances the overall experience for both parties.
I can imagine as a buyer it’s easy to get carried away with your spending so it’s important to know your financial limits and maybe give yourself a budget.
Ask yourself what you realistically can afford or want to spend. Are you keeping track of purchases? Are you keeping a note of what you’ve spent and what is left?
Be honest with yourself, I know it’s easy to get caught up in the moment and go over budget here or there but it’s important to be firm with yourself especially if it means it’s eating into money for things such as necessities.
Sometimes a break from the site is necessary. It can get overwhelming, even borderline addictive and it’s good to recognise when you may need a little break from it all.
If it stops becoming fun or is getting in the way of other things, if it feels overwhelming or draining then just take a step back and come back when you feel ready. Don’t pressure yourself to rush back.
Taking a break can also mean a break from buying/ spending. I don’t know what it’s like to be a buyer, but I do know it can be tiring, messages to get through or worrying you’re spending too much time on site or money.
Never apologise for needing a break! This should be a fun comfortable place for you to be not a chore, you have to put yourself first.
As a seller I have some responsibilities to my buyers: -
Ensuring they aren’t spending what they can’t afford, this requires honesty on their part as well, I can’t be responsible for someone not being forthcoming or honest but if they say they can’t afford something or I suspect it’s an issue I leave it at that, I don’t pry, and I won’t leave someone in a bad financial position.
Safe play, all play should be safe and consenting. Safe words should be used when necessary, limits (including names) to be discussed beforehand. After care and checking in are also important.
Discretion, I will never do anything to interfere or cause issues in someone’s personal life. Fantasy and reality are two different things and it’s important to know where the line is drawn.
This is just a few but important examples of what I see as my responsibilities.
As I mentioned above, I require honesty on your part. You are ultimately in charge of your own money and budget and must be honest about it.
You need to be upfront about things not just money. You need to express limits and boundaries to make any play time fun.
I take my time and like to ensure that I know enough about someone when we are playing so not to overstep or ruin the mood. Yes, it’s a little time consuming sometimes and doesn’t seem fun but it’s important to give you the best experience.
You need to work with us as sellers, we need to be a team.
This is a fun place to be, an escapism but we need to remain realistic and safe.
It’s very easy to get carried away particularly when aroused, we aren’t thinking with 100% clarity so having things in place to keep our fun responsible gives us a feeling of control whilst maintaining the fun.
So, what advice or tips do I have for this?
Make a budget/ being realistic with spending.
Take your time, no rush to spend, spend, spend or know what you want straight away.
If you feel it’s becoming overwhelming or not fun anymore, take a step back and have a break, maybe even give yourself a designated break, a day a week where you log out and take time for something else or a few hours where you focus on other things.
Being responsible may seem an odd concept on a site for kink but it doesn’t detract from the fun, besides it’s not the fun it’s what’s beneath it, our personal lives that we are protecting.
Also, importantly we are protecting our mental wellbeing, overspending, putting yourself in a position that will leave a bad taste in your mouth is the last thing we want to do here.
Just being mindful and honest with ourselves as well as others while putting some boundaries in place is healthy and makes the fun that much better. The idea of responsible play is so it is fun.
Thank you for reading, I appreciate it.
Stay kinky! X
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