By Kinks_and_curves 300 views 28th Oct 2024
Other people can plant seeds of doubt in us, it may be that they make a remark or comment about your kink or body, the way you dress.
It doesn’t take long for that seed to grow, watered by our own preexisting self-doubt!
The opinions and attitudes of others aren’t always going to be pleasant; opinions are like arse holes; everyone has one and you don’t have to listen because what they say needs to have no bearing on you or your life. Opinions are not facts!
So, if someone says you’re a freak for enjoying a certain kink or remarks about you as a person please don’t take notice because it is just words! In order to love ourselves we need to see our worth and not allow the poisonous words of others to pollute our minds.
This blog is also about learning to embrace our kinks so I wanted to talk about how society can impact our thinking around kink.
Even though it is 2024 there is still much stigma around kink, and I think some of that is ignorance and some is fear. We fear what we don’t understand, we fear things that are different. I have seen plenty of narrow-minded comments online aimed at those who sell fet**h items, society has enforced the idea that making money off kink is weird, that those who buy are odd! I don’t for one minute think that not because I am a seller because I have an open mind.
If you already feel odd then these comments can reinforce that feeling, if enough people say (for example) that having a foot fet**h is weird you might start to think it is true.
People would rather brush off their own desires and push their insecurities onto others than just embrace the perfectly natural pleasure of enjoying a kink, they are scared to indulge it.
It is natural to doubt yourself and try repressing it more if you think that makes you fit in or “normal”, we don’t like feeling the odd one out, we don’t want to be judged so we try hide what we love and don’t allow ourselves to embrace things.
s**, fantasies, kinks, desires and lust are all normal human wants! We like what we like, suppressing your desires is just going to make you miserable and it quite frankly does not work!
You aren’t alone, look at this site it is a community full of kinky people, kink is real, it is enjoyed by many people.
You aren’t strange, you aren’t the only one, you are just being yourself. We put on a mask to the outside world, and we suppress ourselves in so many other aspects of life, the rage we feel at our boss, the frustration of being on hold in a phone queue. We don’t need to suppress our lust; we deserve to enjoy ourselves.
Embrace your kinks, allow yourself to find others to share that with, if you enjoy feet don’t try push it aside or bury it in you because it is not healthy and eventually you will find yourself needing to succ*mb to it so don’t waste time trying to hide who you are.
This is you as a person as well as your kinks, they are part of you, part of what makes you unique and great! I say this a lot because it is true, there is only one you on this earth, out of billions of people just one you and I think that is amazing!
You bring your own style, personality, laugh, smile, scent, taste and so much more, this should absolutely be celebrated!
There is nothing wrong with you, having a kink doesn’t make you less of a person, there is no shame in buying and selling, I get so much out of being a seller I wouldn’t change it, and I wouldn’t change who I am! I am not everyone’s cup of tea and that is fine because I am not a mug and also some people prefer coffee, but the point is you are incredible.
Sometimes people judge us because they envy us, they envy our courage or our confidence, they wish they could embrace themselves more.
For some kink is a scary topic because they hide theirs, they don’t have the courage to explore or say out loud they have a kink, but their suppression is their choice, if they make you feel bad or make unpleasant comments that is on them!
Wolves don’t lose sleep over the opinion of sheep!
Something that helps me ma**ively is putting a spin on my thinking, so when I get a troll or someone who is rude, I take their attempts at insults and twist them, I will give you some examples.
You’re a whore! Yes, I am and a fine one at that.
You’re ugly! That is your opinion.
Nobody wants your stuff! Over 300 happy buyers say otherwise.
What other people think of me is irrelevant! I like me and that is all that matters, anyone else liking me is a bonus, I spin my thinking because it makes me smile and it turns a negative into a positive.
If you can laugh at yourself, it takes away the ability for others to laugh at you!
We should always celebrate who we are, we all bring something to the table.
I don’t like seeing people feeling bad about themselves or their kinks, I want to help you embrace who you are, and I want you to enjoy yourself.
There is so much negativity already around kink, buying and selling, I know some feel embarra**ed about these things, but I want to break these stigmas, and I want you to know there is no shame in anything that happens here or in what any of us do or enjoy.
You deserve to embrace who you are and what you love.
I want those of you who feel odd to know you aren’t.
I want those of you who need a confidence boost to get it.
Being a seller or a buyer, we put so much of ourselves out there, we should feel confident and should be able to enjoy ourselves.
If you see someone struggling with kink remind them there is no shame in it.
Be gentle and supportive if someone is new to the site or new to kink.
Be kind to each other.
Remind yourself you are worthy, loved and s**y.
Remember as a buyer you deserve to feel good, to enjoy yourself.
Thank you for reading! X
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