Networking is fundamental to any business, it’s how we learn and grow. How we expand, as well as finding out our strengths and weaknesses.
It is important to remember that although the concept is the same, what works for one may not work for another. So tweaking the concept so that it works for you is vital in how you find your path to success.
To me though, networking isn’t about finding someone to sell too. I know, I know, time is money BUT what we do is personal. All so personal, that I believe it benefits both buyer and seller to really take the time to get this right. Make it extra special. After all we are selling our most intimate things.
We are a community of like-minded people, a support network of all things kinky. Networking is about building a connection with both buyers and sellers. Getting to know both sides of the spectrum is a great way of not only understanding what they like, but it can also help us figure out what we like and dislike.
In the industry that we are in, we all find ourselves with limitations and boundaries that are either lenient or are one of our hard limits. I know myself, from first joining All Things Worn that I thought I had so many boundaries but it wasn’t until I slowly started learning and understanding about these kinks and fetishes in more detail; through conversation with both buyers and/or sellers, that I started to comfortably expand my comfort zone. The thing with your comfort zone is that the only way to expand it is to step out of it and try something new. “Feel the fear and do it anyway”. (As long as it’s something you're comfortable with, never push onto a hard limit to please someone else if it is a definitive no from you.) Both buyers and sellers give us an insight into so many different things, as well as great advice on the things we may not know so much about. This not only helps you grow as a person, but it gives you the knowledge to expand your business to different areas which you may not have thought about or tried before.
When you have figured out your niche and get to know yours/your potential buyers’ preferences don’t be disheartened if you don't make a sale straight away. Don’t be disheartened if you connect with someone and you still don’t make a sale.
I know there is nothing worse than what feels like wasted time, I’m not denying that doing what we do, we meet a lot of window shoppers, but let’s flip this negative mindset around. Let me give you a new perspective on the way to look at this situation.
You are in your day to day life, at home, at work, wherever. You offer someone a piece of gum, but they say no. Does this bother you?
No, you carry on chewing your gum and offer it to someone else. Just because the person doesn’t want your gum this time, doesn’t mean they will never take it off you. They might not be in the mood for it today, or they may have had gum off someone else.
So let's flip this back to business and used panties (or other items you’re selling). You’ve networked, you have reached out, discussed items, but you have not managed to secure a sale. Remember the person didn’t want gum this time, your buyer isn’t saying no. They are saying not right now. We have to look at it from a buyer's perspective otherwise it would be selfish because, at one time or another in our lives, you have been the buyer. It may not be on a site like this but we continuously purchase, whether that be food, clothing or other general items. This in retrospect is the same thing, just a different scenario.
From networking, you constantly meet new people which is a new chance to grow. You figure out the differences in the types of people you’re associating with and you also learn the things that are either working or not working for you. Which allows you to reflect, and tweak your approach next time you’re reaching out to someone new.
Networking is actively creating your own opportunities, for everyone that says no, there is someone that will say yes. It gives you the chance to spark up conversations with people who you’d not had the chance to speak to before.
Before I give you what i believe is my 3 simple steps, please and I can’t stress this enough please don’t hit people with a hard sale from the get go!
You know what it’s like when people come to your door wanting you to switch energy providers but you’re happy with what you’ve got now. You don’t want it, as you feel forced into it. Instead, breathe, relax and take a step back.
The most important bullet point! Authenticity shines through.
If you are putting on bravado to make a sale then this in an act you have to keep up, which in the long run is so much more hassle than it is worth. Remember what I said in my previous blog post “If you’re persistent you’ll get what you want, if you’re consistent you will keep it.” Although if this works for you, good on you and well done.
I believe that being genuine and polite is the best way to go forward. A simple “Hello, how’re you?” Goes a long way. Be kind, pleasant and polite.
Has someone taken the time out to view your profile? Like your photo? Comment on your listing? Thank them.
They may be too shy to contact you, they may also just be having a browse. So remember the gum scenario we discussed earlier and don’t be disheartened if they don’t reply this time.
Now, this is a little tricky one, it’s not hard to do but I have spoken to numerous new buyers that are overwhelmed by the response they get when first joining the site. Mainly, and I’m saying this with love, the overwhelming feeling they get is due to the way in which they are approached by the majority of sellers.
In my experience, from what I have heard, and how I approach things myself I believe that it is the way some of us go in for the sale like we are animals stalking our prey. You can’t do this and get angry with them when they don’t commit. Let them breathe. There’s already so much sexiness going on, on this site. Give them time to take it all in, let them enjoy the beauty of who we are and what we have to offer.
I’m not telling you not to reach out. As this whole blog is about networking, what I’m saying to you is that there are ways in which we can do things that not only expand our network but also invites new members into our community with open welcoming arms. I find what works for me is keeping things simple. “Welcome to All Things Worn”.
Something as short and sweet as this not only gives people a warm welcome, it can avoid any potential negative feelings on both sides. One isn’t feeling forced into something and the other isn't disheartened because they get nothing. In a positive and welcoming approach, you have opened the pathway to communication, step back and allow them to reach out if they wish.
Remember for every no, there is a yes. If it leads to somewhere then it is a positive for both sides and a bonus for you. If it doesn’t, then you have been polite enough to leave the door open without ruining any potential chance of something in the future.
If you want to go fast, go alone. If you want to go far, go with others. You have to be visible within the community. You have to go out there and connect with people. It’s not called net-sitting or net-eating, it's called networking.
You have to work at it.
Thank you guys for reading my blog. If I can help one person on their journey then I have achieved something by doing this.
Peace and Love My Kinky Bunch,
Kitty x
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